Confessions of A Real-Life Shopaholic
The Nashua Telegraph of New Hampshire has a humdinger of a court story this morning. (I love local papers, and am hoping the internet will eventually help them thrive rather than killing them. Really, when would I have read The Nashua Telegraph in print?) Anyway, one Meredith Moore-Flores, 31, divorced mother of four, was sentenced to one to five years in state prison for stealing $62,000 from her employer.
Moore-Flores confessed to skimming the funds from Insight Technologies by filing bogus expense reports. (She also claimed to be a student at a local college to score tuition reimbursement.) Assistant Rockingham County Attorney Amy Connolly, the Telegraph noted, said Moore-Flores had been involved in similar schemes at two previous employers in Massachusetts, and was making $1,000 a month restitution to one of them.
Moore-Flores told the judge that she has a “spending addiction” for which she is now receiving therapy. According to the Nashua Telegraph, Moore-Flores said: “It isn’t just about spending money you don’t have or maxing out your credit cards. It’s an attempt to buy happiness … and push aside feelings of self-doubt.”
"Confessions of a Shopaholic" looked at the lighter side of spending addiction.
In a study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, researchers Abhishek Srivastava, Edwin Locke and Kathryn Bartol asked more than 250 graduate students and 145 entrepreneurs how important financial success was versus their other goals, and what their motives were for making money. The researchers offered alternatives such as security, the ability to donate to charity or pursue leisure activities.
Among respondents who placed a heavy emphasis on materialism, the prime reasons offered were social comparison (“To have a house and car that are better than those of my neighbor”), seeking power, showing off, and overcoming self-doubt (“To prove that I am not as dumb as some people assumed.”) The researchers found a negative relationship between the importance of money and subjective well-being because of the motives driving acquisitive behaviors. (Interestingly, Moore-Flores was also an entrepreneur who owned a consignment shop.)
The tragedy, of course, is when shopaholics have financial responsibility for people other than themselves. Moore-Flores’ attorney had asked for minimal jail time because she is the primary caretaker for her kids — ages 8, 6, 4, and 2. As the tearful mother told the judge: “I thought, ‘How did I get to this point in my life? How do I explain this to my children?’ ”
Do you think Moore-Flores should get a minimal sentence or the max? Does a “spending addiction” excuse her behavior?
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March 18th, 2010 at 9:17 pm
I think Moore Flores should get the max. Having a shopping addiction should not excuse her. She has to pay for her actions. Stealing is wrong regardless. Example, someone is caught with drugs but does not get put in jail simply because the person is addicted to drugs. I feel that she should get help while in prison.
March 20th, 2010 at 9:58 am
I think that letting Moore-Flores off easy will not help her in the future. This is her third time stealing from an employer, and she’s dealing with the repercussions of the other two cases, including paying back what she stole, and yet she has continued to steal. Along with therapy, the penalty of several years in prison would serve to really wake her up to what she has been doing. Yes, she has four young children to care for, but she has not been adequately caring for them as is by setting such an example.
~MJQ
March 20th, 2010 at 10:37 am
I think More-Floores should get the minimum sentence. She showed the judge that she was felt really upset for her addiction. Also, the fact that she has children will make it hard for her if given maximum sentence. If she is granted minimum sentence, she will learn from her mistake and never commit the action again. She can resort to other sentences besides spending time in jail. For example, she may go to a psychologist and speak to him about her problems in spending addiction. Also, he or she can discuss the solutions she can resort to to resolve this addiction. A “spending addiction” may not only accuse her behavior. As listed in the blog, she may have had a childhood experience that made her who she was today. Also, her personality could have shaped the fact that she had a “spending addiction.” Maybe, she had a feeling of self-doubt in herself at times.
March 21st, 2010 at 8:33 pm
A spending addiction definitely does NOT excuse her behavior. Stealing from your own company or stealing in general should not be excused just because of a proclaimed addiction. Moore-Flores knew that what she was doing was wrong before she committed the act and that should have been enough for her to refrain from doing it. It seems as if she is just looking for an excuse to take the blame off her shoulders.
Moore-Flores shouldn’t receive a minimal punishment because the action is wrong no matter who does it. Plus, she has a history of similar activity. How will she learn if she is given special circumstances just because she has four children? Everyday there are people who are put in prison and they also are primary caregivers. However, they committed a crime of which they knew there would be consequences so they are still incarcerated. Moore-Flores should receive a punishment that is appropriate for the amount of money she stole and how she stole it.
- NMB
March 22nd, 2010 at 8:31 am
I do not think that Morre-Flores should get the maximum sentence for her crimes. The main reason behind my opinion is the fact that she is the primary caregiver for four children. However, I also do not feel that the minimum sentence would be the right answer here either, a crime was committed and thus the judge should take both the aggrivating factors and the mitigating factors into account and come to a reasonable punishment for her crimes. Furthermore, this “spending addiction” is not a reasonable excuse for her crimes, drug addicts are held accountable for the crimes they commit in order get more drugs. Therefore Moore-Flores should also be accountable for the crimes she committed to feed her addiction.
March 22nd, 2010 at 1:09 pm
Personally, I think that Moore-Flores should get a minimal sentence not because her crime wasn’t a serious one but because she is the only guardian of four young children. Many people would say that someone else could take care of the children but that is confusing and not fair to the kids because they may think they are being punished for something they didn’t do.
Also, even though I don’t believe a “spending addiction” is an excuse for her behavior, she realizes that she has made a mistake and is already seeking help for this problem. And to prove to the courts that she deserves the best, I think she should do community service or be a public speaker to young children about responsibility and her experiences.
C.G.
March 22nd, 2010 at 4:04 pm
I believe that she should get the maximum punishment, simply because of the fact that she has done this before. In addition to that I believe that she is only remorseful and thinking of her children and all the people this has affected as an afterthought, now that she will ultimately have to deal with the harsh consequences instead of circumventing it like before. I don’t think that using her spending addiction as an appeal is a valid argument either. My reasoning for this is because there is a huge diffusion of responsibility in that claim, stealing is wrong regardless of the circumstance. Are we supposed to excuse a murderer because he has been diagnosed with bi-polar disorder or a mental imbalance? No they receive punishment within the confines and abidance of the law just as anyone else. I think that it is time for people to become morally responsible for their actions instead of creating a façade or diffusing responsibility onto someone or something else.
March 22nd, 2010 at 4:25 pm
I believe that Moore-Flores should receive a minimal sentence due to her family and her mental condition. Many other people being accused of a crime with a mental disorder has received a lighter sentence than a normal sane person. A spending addiction still effects a person altering their actions. Her family needs her and prison may not be the best treatment she requires.
CSV
March 22nd, 2010 at 11:26 pm
I think that Moore-Flores shouldn’t get the maximum sentence but the minimum sentence. The fact that she has children should not weigh into her sentence because if this is so, then should murders or other criminals get a slap on the wrist for having children as well? Her shopping addiction should however have an effect on what her sentence is. I think she should get the minimum sentence with therapy or some form of help for her shopping addiction. Though the monetary damage she did was bad her addiction does justify it. If she is simply given the maximum sentence with no treatment, she will not learn anything and will continue on her destructive path and may have some negative influence on her children.
March 22nd, 2010 at 11:46 pm
From reading this article, I believe that external factors such as that she has 4 little kids and that she suffers from an addiction should NOT influence the decision against her charges. Stealing is wrong from any point of view, and her spending addiction does not justify her actions. If she was being sincere when she told the judge “How did I get to this point in my life?” She would have seek help before. I believe she only reacted that way because now she saw the consequences of her actions and was obviously fearful about it. I believe she should get the max sentence because her actions affected the lives of her victims from where she was getting the money. I believe that everyone deserves a second chance, but I also believe that we have to be fair to everyone and not take preferences. First, she should get the max sentence for her actions and after she gets better she would have the opportunity to live a better life. But first she needs to be responsible and admit the consequences of her actions.
March 23rd, 2010 at 8:54 am
I think that Moore-Flores should get the maximum penalty for the crimes that she has committed. I feel sorry for her children however, that’s no excuse as to why she should be let off the hook that easily. She obviously didn’t consider what her actions might do to her children then, so why should we believe that she cares now. If in fact she really does have an addiction problem, then maybe doing the maximum time will toughen her up and make her realize the value of her children. Maybe then will she learn to not put her children’s future in jeopardy again.
March 23rd, 2010 at 9:00 am
This story is really interesting. This woman has kids involved and that is the most incompetent thing anyone can do. Her case stands out as a mental incompetence. For her to even have the idea of stealing had already put her kids in jeopardy. Although all the money that she had consistently stole is not an excuse for her being with her kids and avoiding the maximum time in jail, her kids are still an important factor in how much time she will serve. Whatever happens to the mother determines the future of the kids as well. Where will they go? Who will take care of them? What if they find out why their mom is serving time? What behaviors will they acquire during the time their mother is gone? What is the range of the age group of children that she has? Will they be mentally affected by this situation? Was the mother serving time the best choice for the mental status of the children?
Personally, I believe this woman should get the minimum sentence because although what she did was morally wrong, we have to consider the lives of the children and their comfort as well. If their comfort lies in the hand of the mother, I do not even believe that she should receive anytime. If the one in higher authority can put her in counseling, therapy, and addiction rehabilitation to get her mentally stable, it would be much of a better choice for the kids. Because the mother was wrong does not mean one should put innocent children’s lives in jeopardy.
Other options would be foster care, adoption, and so forth. That atmosphere does not seem convenient to innocent children. It can lead to instability amongst the whole family.
March 23rd, 2010 at 10:37 am
I believe that Moore-Flores should receive the maximum amount of jail time that anyone would receive who committed the same crime. The need to shop does not justify her actions, she still committed a crime. She had already stolen money from a previous employer before, which she is still paying back, if she did not learn her lesson then, when will she, which is why a greater punishment is needed. Using her kids as an excuse is ridiculous. If she was so concerned with the time spent being in jail instead of being with her children, she should not have taken the risk and stolen the money. She had to pay for the consequences. Having an “addiction” to shopping is not an excuse, if someone was addicted to alcohol and they killed someone while drinking and driving, are we not going to put them in jail just because they have an addiction, I think not. She committed the crime of stealing the money, now she can take the responsibility and do the time.
March 23rd, 2010 at 11:59 am
When reading about this woman and her problem, I still do not think that she should get full sentence, because like said it is an addiction. Going away to jail for a few years and even for life won’t heal the addiction unless she gets some kind of help. I do believe that she should be reprimanded for what she did, but I do not think that she should get all five years because of the fact that she is not the only person out there who has done this. Government officials have done worse and they get away with murder. I also feel that she should not get full time because she does have children and I do not care what anyone has to say about how she should have thought about her children before doing what she did because no one knows what her true meaning was behind doing what she did. She could have stolen the money for a better life of her children and that is why she did it. Or it could just be the case that she is addicted and she really needs help. So yes, I do think she should get some time, but I do not think that she should get the full time.
March 23rd, 2010 at 12:15 pm
I believe that Moore-Flores deserves to spend about three years in prison because of her crime. There are others out there that have done worse things and are in jail for about five years, yet she needs to be punished for her behavior in order to learn that it is wrong. More-Flores also should be ordered to seek counseling because just punishing her with jail time will not allow her to fix her shopping and money addiction. People with addictions need counseling since they go to severe and awful extents just to feed their addiction. Granted she does have children, in order for her to be a good parent she needs to learn her lesson and better herself so she can guide her children into a healthy and uncorrupted life and future. Moore-Flores has stolen $62,000 and has stolen form 3 employers. This shows the depth and severity of her addiction and at least three years jail time is definitely necessary along with therapy in order to demolish this chronic obsession.
March 23rd, 2010 at 12:52 pm
I feel that Moore-Flores deserves the maximum jail time for this crime. She has already had problems with stealing from her employers and is already paying her previous employer one thousand dollars a month. Obviously she has not yet learned her lesson and needs time to think about what she has done and how it has affected her, as well as her family. She may be an addict, but that is no excuse. Time in jail is what she needs in order to process the harm she has caused. It is sad due to the fact that she has four kids, but have a mother who steals is no example they should be living by, especially is she is stealing from her current job to pay off the money she stole from her previous employer (no lesson learned at all!). She must take responsibility for her actions and not ask people to pity her for taking money that was not hers in the first place. There are many people out there in the world that wish to have more money in order to buy more things, however that does not mean that they should steal it.
~VBH
March 23rd, 2010 at 1:56 pm
I can understand what Moore-Flores is saying when she says that her spending addiction is about attempting to push aside feelings of self-doubt. Mny people belive that in order to feel adequate they must possess materialistic items or some type of physical attraction to draw people to themselves. It’s sad that people feel this way but the mind set of our society is all about valuing physical possessions i.e friends, money, clothes, etc. It’s a dirty cycle that evolves when individuals feel inadiquate and alone, so they become so eager to fill that void that they go to such levels of indecency to gain the approval of others, which leads to conterfeit friendship and ultimates unhappiness. None of us who seek these things are any different than Moore-Floores. Her actions are not excusable by any means because she was fully aware of he actions and chose to commit a crime(s) anyway. I do beleive that she should have the minimum sentence or something in between the min. and max, if possible (there are consequences for her actions). That she did was wrong but her children still need their mother and with the right help and the right attitude she can get herself together.
March 23rd, 2010 at 2:18 pm
I believe that Moore-Flores should receive the maximum amount of jail time for her crime, as well as therapy for her shopping addiction. Regardless, what she did was wrong and we all know that stealing is wrong, including her. We should not make excuses for people that they have a certain problem that causes them to commit a crime. Some people have said she should not get the maximum time in jail because she is the primary caregiver to four children. If she was not thinking about her children or how they would be affected while she was committing the crime, then they should obviously not be a factor in deciding time in jail.
I think some people forget what she is being punished for; Moore-Flores is not being punished because of a shopping addiction, she is going to jail because she STOLE THOUSANDS of dollars. Every other person would go to jail if they did the same. On top of that, she has stole money from two previous employers, so clearly she is not going to stop that easily. I think a relevant example similar to this situation would be in the case of a drunk driver. If an alcoholic gets pulled over for drunk driving, is the officer going to let him go because he is addicted to alcohol? No. Therefore, this woman should not get off with a minimal punishment for STEALING THOUSANDS of dollars, because she is addicted to shopping.
March 23rd, 2010 at 2:56 pm
I believe that regardless to the crime that she has committed people fail to realize that she is a addict and needs help. Although being an addict is not an excuse to get off with such a crime, it needs to be taken into consideration that most addicts have no control over their desires. And not one addiction is to be taken any lighter than another, being that she is stealing money, she has four kids that are probably affected by her money issues and the crimes that she commit. Also regardless to the amount of time she spends in jail to “learn her lesson” it still does not excuse the fact that she has a money spending issue and unless that she can fix that problem, she is still going to have money issues and most likely will commit the same type of crime again, until she steals money from the wrong person or owes money to the wrong people and ends up dead.
March 23rd, 2010 at 4:03 pm
I feel that Moore-Flores should get the maximum amount for her punisment. She has already had her oportunities to prove that she would not mess up again, and all she did was prove that she was unable to be trusted. Although she has children, Moore-Flores is addicted to getting money. She is unable to help her family, because she is putting them in jepordy because of her constant trouble with the law. Through her jail time she will be able to say away from such temptation. The reader is able to see that she has a problem, but even though she has a problem, she is a hazzard to society. Moore-Flores needs to get her punisment to learn a lesson, and not commit this crime again.
March 24th, 2010 at 8:47 am
I believe that Moore-Flores receiving would not change the problem she or make her become better. She has an addiction/ psychological issue and does not understand the harm she is doing to herself or others around her. If anything he jail time should be having to seek help. Yes she is morally but giving her a greater punishment wont change her lifestyle as we could see; she committed the similar crime twice.
Shopping addiction does not excuse her behavior but should be seen as someone with a problem and is unable to control their behavior. Clearly she has no control of her behavior ; its her emotions that are taking over. If she receives a minimal sentence it probably wont change her behavior or addiction.
March 24th, 2010 at 11:01 pm
Due to the fact that Moore-Flores had been involved previously in scamming employers, I think she should be made to serve the maximum sentence. There is a saying, “Three strikes and you’re out.” She clearly is not improving from her previous ways, so she should learn her lesson the hard way. Additionally, I don’t think that a so-called “spending addiction” should excuse her from anything. An addiction is an addiction. If she were an alcoholic and killed someone while driving under the influence, the court would not excuse you for a “drinking addition.” Moore-Flores has an obligation to be an example for her children, and this is not the way to be a positive influence.
March 25th, 2010 at 9:28 am
I believe that Moore-Flores has a serious addiction that five years in prison will not cure. However, this does not mean that she should be excused for her actions. People with addictions should be held entirely accountable for their actions but they should also receive the help they need. I feel that Moore-Flores should receive a reasonable amount of jail time for her crime (about 2-3 years) and subsequently be sent to a shopping addiction rehabilitation center (if those even exist). Taking her four children into consideration, one can only hope they have someone else to stay with, if not they will have to go to a foster home until Moore-Flores gets back on her feet. The kids should not excuse her because she was not concerned about her kids when she commit these crimes. This is not her first offense and I feel that it is time to take serious action and get her the help she deserves
March 29th, 2010 at 6:13 pm
I am a firm believer in the idea that she should serve the maximum sentence in accordance to her crime. During that time, she should also be brought into a program that helps her deal with and hopefully overcome her so called “shopping addiction”. When discussing this issue with others, some mentioned that she shouldn’t be punished for her addiction. However, I feel that giving a max sentence will not be because she has that addiction, but because she has committed a major crime. Just like with those pesky speeding tickets, you can tell the officer all day about how you have had a bad day, or need to go to the bathroom. No matter, by saying this you are still acknowledging that you were aware of the crime committed. And, unfortunately, more times than not, you will get that ticket. Lock her up!
March 30th, 2010 at 3:25 am
Spending addiction is a legit problem that we see in the coming generations due to the media that so easily influence the teenagers these days. Statistics do show that 10-15% of the teenagers are addictied to shopping and many of the married women as well. Moore-flores do have a legit problem with spending because she is already filed for recovering money from where she stole while she committed another robbery. And therefore need to be advised by court to take therapy classes and make her find a job to repay all the money so she would understand the pain of making money and would not let her emotions and desires get in the way of spending unwisely.
March 30th, 2010 at 8:25 am
I do not think that Moore- Flores should receive the maximum sentence because, yes the crime that she committed was very serious but she is also the primary care giver to her children. I know that that is not a very good excuse to use because she will not learn anything from what she has done if she does not get punished. However she also should not only get off with the minimum sentence. I believe that she should get 2-3 years in jail and than she should have to attend some type of counseling and a probation also. This is not like it is the first time she has stole something, this is the third time she is committing a crime like this and she should definitely get reprimanded for it.
A spending addiction does not excuse anybody from stealing any amount of money. Just because people like to buy things it does not mean it is an addiction. Everyone likes to buy new things and that is why companies come out with new stuff every now and than. I just think that is an excuse for her to just not want to work and be able to buy stuff. She is basically just lazy.
April 13th, 2010 at 9:47 pm
Unfortunately, because she does have very young children to take care of, I do not think that excuses her of her actions. Moore-Flores knew she had young children when she was spending wildly. A shopping addiction is a lowsy excuse for her money hungry ambitions. Stealing is stealing no matter what you stole. People steal food from food stores to feed their hungry families and still get convicted. She stole thousands of dollars from her job, that is already paying her, so that she can shop. Completely inexcusable. If she gets off easy now there is no telling what she will do next, not mention what kind of example the system will be setting for future theives. I understand that she has young children, but hopefully there is a grandparent that they can stay with for five years, because she deseves the full penalty.